


One in a Million

by BaronVonChop



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy
Genre: Bittersweet, Everything goes like it does in the movie, Gay Luke, Just So We're Clear, Luke has a big ol' crush on Han, M/M, One-Sided Attraction, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-03
Updated: 2019-12-03
Packaged: 2021-02-26 02:27:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,073
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21655999
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BaronVonChop/pseuds/BaronVonChop
Summary: Luke realizes he has a crush on Han.(Explores Luke's one-sided feelings through the events of A New Hope.)
Relationships: Luke Skywalker/Han Solo
Comments: 4
Kudos: 105





	One in a Million

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks, as always, to my amazing beta reader for corrections and suggestions! Any remaining mistakes are on me.

Luke wondered when it had happened: when he had fallen for Han Solo. It wasn't at their first meeting, he knew that much. Han had slouched in his cantina seat and scoffed at the idea of Luke piloting a ship. Luke had decided at the time that he did not like the laconic smuggler, or his dumb sideburns, or his dumb chest hair.

And by the time they were on the Death Star, Luke already felt that dizzying combination of familiarity and anxiety around Han. Sneaking around, rescuing the princess, fighting stormtroopers, escaping the trash compactor, fighting more stormtroopers… it was already overwhelming enough without his brain going melty whenever he looked at the lanky, impulsive man.

It must have been on the _Falcon_. It probably started when he saw Han in action, fleeing Star Destroyers while preparing to jump to lightspeed. Luke's heart was already pounding in his chest as the whole ship rocked from near-misses exploding nearby. But with death possible at any moment, he did not have time to fully process whatever it was he was feeling.

It was only when things had calmed down a bit that it first felt like a crush. Han joined Luke and Ben in the _Falcon_ 's main hold to let them know they had escaped the Empire. He watched Luke practicing with the lightsaber. For all his talk of good blasters and luck, he really seemed to be curious about what Luke was doing. Han played it cool, which Luke found annoying. He wasn't so sure about this whole Force thing himself, but now he wanted to learn more, so that he could show Han that Ben was right.

Something about Han's world-weary attitude made Luke want to impress him. His opportunity came when they made their escape from the Death Star. Luke blew away a TIE fighter from the _Millennium Falcon_ 's bottom blaster turret, and even the adrenaline rush of success could not compare with the warm glow he felt when Han cheered, "Great shot, kid!" Luke had to smile when Han added, "Don't get cocky."

When they returned to the cockpit, Luke was still riding high on that feeling. Feeling bold, he decided to ask Han how he felt about Leia. Maybe if Han hadn't fallen for Leia yet, Luke still stood a chance of catching the rangy pilot's eye.

Han insisted he was trying not to think about her. Luke didn't have much practice with flirting, and he wondered if he was pushing his luck by replying "good." He kept his eyes forward, hoping his heart would slow down, waiting for Han's reaction. Had he been too obvious?

"Still, she's got a lot of spirit," Han said. Try as he might, Luke could not keep the disappointment off his face. "What do you think?" Han asked. "Do you think a princess, and a guy like me…"

"No!" Luke said quickly. Too quickly. Han gave him an appraising look, and Luke couldn't look him in the eye. Maybe Han would think that Luke was interested in Leia, too. Would that be less embarrassing?

Then Han grinned. He knew.

Luke should have felt foolish--well, he did feel foolish--but for some reason, he didn't feel entirely bad. In some way, he was still happy to have shared this moment with Han. It was part of their larger adventure. He and Han, and Leia and Chewie, would always have their friendship, and who knew what the future would bring?

Perhaps that was why Luke felt so disappointed when Han refused to join the attack on the Death Star. "You're turning your back on them," Luke said, but what he wanted to say was, "You're turning your back on me." He couldn't keep the bitterness out of his voice. Tears pricked his eyes, so he turned before Han could see them.

"Hey Luke," Han said. Luke turned back, doing his best to glare. He didn't know what he expected, but it certainly wasn't for Han to say "May the Force be with you." Han's sudden, awkward sincerity gave him a glimpse of something, and he tried to puzzle out what that might be on his way back to the ship.

They would never be lovers--the more he thought about it, the more certain he became that Han was already halfway in love with Leia--but there was a bond between them, and Han knew it, too. That was something.

Luke would have time to figure it out later, after the attack on the Death Star. If he lived that long.

Speeding down the Death Star trench with Obi-Wan's voice in his head and Darth Vader on his tail, Luke thought he had put Han out of his mind. Then he heard Han whoop over the comm and his heart did a cartwheel in his chest. "You're all clear, kid!" Han exclaimed. Luke experienced one dizzying moment where he felt like Han was his. That moment, at least, was theirs. It would not, could not last. "Now let's blow this thing and go home!" And Luke knew he could do it.

He was barely out of his X-Wing when Leia rushed to embrace him. He spun her around while they both laughed with joy and relief. After all the times they had nearly died that day, now was the first time they were truly out of danger.

Then he heard Han's voice. He turned and saw Han hurrying toward them, and Luke couldn't restrain himself from throwing himself at Han. He had a wild impulse to kiss him. It made no sense--he knew Han didn't feel that way about him--but he was so happy, and Han was so happy. But the giddy moment passed without a kiss, and then Leia was hugging Han, and Luke knew that his chance was over.

Later, when he and Han walked across the throne room, Luke was overcome with the enormity of recent events. He had experienced a personal tragedy and witnessed a galactic one. He had learned about his father and the Force. He had met some of the most wonderful people he had ever known, including one man who would always have part of his heart.

He shared a smile with Leia, though she had an entirely different smile for Han. Luke realized he wasn't even jealous. How could he blame her for falling for the dashing rogue? After all, Luke had.


End file.
